10 things i enjoy doing

1. lying outside in the shade in 100 degree weather

2. reading the youtube comments on music videos of pop songs

3. taking long walks outside

4. lying on the yoga mat at the end of a yoga class

5. singing while driving

6. picking up and holding my cat

7. spooning with someone after sex

8. dancing

i don't know if there are 10 things i genuinely enjoy doing!! :|

police report

i was surprised by her response and i am surprised by my response to her response

i am crying right now, without being sure why i am crying
i am being kind of childish

i don't think my parents understand me. i don't think i understand them
i don't know how a person like me emerged from a combination of their genes and this environment
i don't know how to solve or articulate these problems properly

maybe i don't have any other responses to "not getting my way" than crying

it's like i barely have enough energy to go about my life uninterrupted
and when things deviate from that in any way
i feel overwhelmed and angry

are children throwing tantrums aware that they are being unreasonable, on some level
do they feel a kind of powerlessness while watching their behavior unfold
almost as something separate from themselves

am i aware i'm being unreasonable
am i being unreasonable

report

i got a lot of my hair cut off

have been getting very into the kim kardashian app

there is a huge painful cystic zit on my chin

i have feel tired and sad a lot lately lol

every body

today i have consumed approximately 1477 calories, maybe more

i want to be so thin that no one ever again describes something i'm wearing
as either "flattering" or "unflattering"

i like drinking green tea
i like things you can consume in excess
without feeling bad about it later

i wear a size 6 and a size small t-shirt, usually
i would like to wear a size 2 and a size x-small
that seems like the logical stopping point

it seems weird that people usually say 'i am a size 10'
instead of 'i wear a size 10'

whats up w me rn

i feel like my limbs are very heavy
i feel like my body significantly disturbs the world whenever it moves
i feel like i could lie down in my bed for 49,000 hours continuously

i need to drink more water
i need to stop drinking coffee
i need to start doing yoga again

i will feel better once i've bought some new clothes
i will feel better once i can run a 5k
i will feel better once the acne scars disappear from my chin

when i go back

i will start drinking less. two drink maximum, missy!

i won't make eye contact with anyone i've kissed

i will continue to run regularly, or start swimming, or something

i will put time and effort into studying efficiently for all my classes

What If I Wrote In Here More Regularly

and in less... gross fragment things

there are thoughts in my brain that are worth elaborating on, maybe

is blogspot outdated enough that using it as a form of communication is kind of funny?? i only do things if they are kind of funny

i think i'm running out of music to listen to. i think i've listened to every song i like at least once today

how is it already 10:53 i'm supposed to be in bed by 11!!!